Sherm Reinhardt, American hero
by Kadmus Greningen
columnist, "Brandy and Pucks"
Te Borscher Sportteelegraaf
Cashoth Pernoth, the normally taciturn, Zimrothian goalminder who backs up our beloved Norbert Grimm, had several words to describe our foreigner Sherman Reinhardt's performance on Saturday night.
"So good, as if, an arrow from Bannar's quiver," he said, the corners of his mouth moving up slightly in what is for most Zimrothians an expression of pure joy.
Bannar, the national hero of Zimrothian saga, once dispatched a Zimrothian dragon with three arrows-- one to the eye, one to the throat, one to the big toe. Characteristically, as Zimrothian saga does have a kind of wryness to it, it was the one in the toe that killed it.
This night, Reinhardt's very first shot taken in the Borschland Hockey League pierced slew perfectly-dubbed Tarlunz netter Dragoon Camarata with a Bannarian arrow.
Reinhardt lost his first face-off to begin the game. There is no shame in that. But he skated after his lost puck like a man whose sweetheart's engagement band has been stolen. Extending his stick to intercept a defenseman's pass, he managed to lift the puck into the air. When it came down, he loosed a shot worthy of a mythical bowman.
With the final score a prodigious 7 goals to 2, Reinhardt's heroism would not mean the salvation of Te Staff; there were many goals to go around tonight against our near neighbors, our Tarlunz Ponders. But may it be a harbinger of the future.
Every year our venerable and venerated team is expected to win the Bloomenstaaf Cup of our league's regular season championship, and every year-- it seems-- we never take the easy route up that mountain.
This year, with the addition of the large and fast-skating man from the mists, the "Merikanische"-- the outside world is none too real to us Borschers-- it is possible that there will be a new way of doing things. Maybe less fingernail-chewing, but Staff Borsch has enough tension on its own without having to resort to more brandy to keep the nerves steady during a tough match.
That venerable old bottle of Te Staff, which has been dispensing championship vintages often and often, now contains some new and strong stuff. Call it Vintage Sherman Reinhardt, or "Sherm" to his colleagues.
We all look forward to sampling more of this stuff.
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