I love advice columns, and I always read Amy Dickinson, though I seldom think she "gets" it. Here is an excerpt from a letter that left my jaw wide open yesterday:
I have been married to a wonderful man for five years. He adores me and treats me like a queen. He cooks dinner for me, pays a maid to clean the house, takes me on trips, etc. All of my single friends wish they could find someone like him.
We just had a baby. He adores her just as much as he adores me. Most women would die for my life.
My problem is I think I would be more compatible with someone else.
I honestly think I want to be married to a pro athlete. I love sports and have loved sports my entire life. I'm not one of those girls who just watches basketball, football or baseball because she is trying to impress her man. I truly love sports and would prefer to be married to an athlete.
I've been approached by pro football and pro basketball players, but I have turned them down because I am married. Now I regret turning them down...
By the end of the letter I wasn't interested in Amy's response. I wanted to know whether this letter was from an actual person who actually was in this situation, or whether it was some screenwriter testing out a hook for a new romantic comedy.
You know, "Nice guy is left for pro athlete by ungrateful wife, who also leaves adorable daughter behind. Nice guy becomes single dad. Has troubles. Meets woman. Complications ensue. Nice guy gets woman. Happily ever after."
I personally think Amy has been hoodwinked. Am I being naive to think that a woman would be able to land a nice guy but have her thoughts on professional athletes instead? That she would be approached by both basketball players and football players (what kind of crowd does she run in?). That she would be that emotionally callous to have had a baby with this man but think she can get rid of him (and the baby???) and pursue hunks?
Women liking athletes makes perfect sense, of course. Women in ancient Rome used to go ga-ga over gladiators. This letter just seems so extreme to me.
Chalk another one up for the sheltered guy.
My beloved niece, who is now an impressive adult, asked me recently about breaking into publishing, and I had the darndest time trying to find the perfect post for her. Finally, I found it, and it's going under popular posts. Almost three years later, it has been spot on for my own efforts at writing success.